When Jaycee Became Like Me

My first conversation with Jaycee's NICU doctor damaged me for years. When he told me he suspected Down syndrome, he pointed out everything "different" on her body. He bluntly said while pointing to my husband and I, "She won't look like your baby pictures or your baby pictures. She has Down syndrome; she won't look like you."

That is when I made my first mistake as a parent. I listened to the doctor and believed his words. After that conversation, I believed she didn't look like me. I believed we were very, very different. When people commented on how she looked like me, I thought they were just trying to be nice. It upset me because my mind flashed back to the doctor who made me feel so disconnected to my own daughter. It probably seems silly to most people but I was convinced that the extra chromosome made Jaycee more unlike me than like me based upon that very first conversation about her genetic condition.

Then it happened one day....When Jaycee was a toddler, I was fixing her hair when I noticed she had a mole in her hair line in the exact place as me. Wow! That mole changed my entire view of Jaycee. She was like me! I realized that Jaycee does have extra genetic information but my husband and I contributed it. I let go of those tainted words of the doctor and looked at Jaycee as someone who could be a lot like me.

As proof, here are the some ways Jaycee and I are alike:

• We both hate dogs. Really, we aren't into animals at all but occasionally we will pet one if it's cute enough.
• We would rather be inside with air conditioning than outside in fresh air.
• We both love to watch Netflix laying in bed with the fan on. (She likes the fan on high but I like it on low.)
• We both love to dance and sing in the car.
• We are not morning people! We are both borderline grumpy in the morning. We'd be much, much perkier if our day could start at 8 am, which rarely ever happens.
• We can eat dessert anytime of day if needed.
• We both get very excited when we see a Disney princess in person.
• We are both very scheduled, routine people. We don't like spontaneous activities!
• We both sweat with minimal physical exertion.
• And I guess we both look a little bit alike too!

 

 

 

The morale of this story?

Don't believe everything you are told about your child.

Even if your child has a genetic condition, they will still be like you.

Sometimes a small thing (like a mole) can make all the difference!